Lazy Mom's blog

Embrace the mess

you're not doing it wrong if you feel like your life is a mess, life with kids is messy, and it's fine, here's why.

Motherhood is full of the mess. It’s learning that things don’t go as planned. It’s realizing that the only control in life we have is over our own reactions, and nothing else. It’s realizing that we can’t control our kids or force them to do anything they really don’t want to do. It’s learning to let go. It’s learning what’s really important and what we can live without.

Motherhood is mess. Real life toy mess. Kitchen and laundry mess. Mom hair mess. Dirty diaper mess.

Motherhood is emotional mess. The postpartum tears. The babyhood exhaustion of a mom who haven’t sleep in months. The toddler-hod confusion of a mom facing first tantrums and meltdowns. The mom of a bigger kid realization that there is always something to learn and that it never get’s really easy. That they change, and we can’t tell in which direction it’ll all go.

It’s the mess of our own reactions. Realization where are our patience limits are. Learning to embrace the unplanned.

Motherhood is a mess in relationships. It’s the sadness over loosing contact with friends that are childless and that we see way too rarely.. It’s the relationship with friends who have kids and with whom we can never finish a sentence during a play date. It’s a mess in friendships, that while so so very important, just have to fall after motherhood.

Motherhood is a mess in a couple. The tired days and exhausted evenings. The conversations unfinished, the I know-you-feel-it too-look. All the feelings shared, though not over a romantic weekly date but over a messy kitchen table with whiny kids around.

All that mess. We can’t run from it. And let’s not believe in lies that if only we’ll clean enough, try harder, parent better, self care more, date and just really try, that then all that mess mess will be gone.

embrace the mess

It wont. This is the time of our lives. The time of mess. Let’s embrace it. Lets smile at it. Lets giggle and accept.

This is the time when our emotions are the heaviest but also the fullest.

This is the time when we love our babies and they love us to the moon and back.

This is the time when we need our fiends like never before.

This is the time when we need out couples to stay strong. In that mess, not without it.

Lets just embrace it. The blurry photos where nobody looks at the camera. The never-really-clean-home. The unfinished conversations. The-I know-you-know-look. The tears and loughs.

And remember, if you feel your life is a mess, don’t ever start thinking that you’re doing it wrong!

Through the  mess of early spring mud, the plants and flowers grow, through the mess of everyday life with kids, you’re growing as a mother and they learn to be happy in the present real life!.

There may be simple solutions for keeping a house clean, and meal plan on point, lunches prepared, and laundry all done, kids calm and obeying and self care, couple connection and social life on point. But the reality is that, while it can be done, it can’t be done all at once. And it’s fine.

Kids don’t need to live in a perfectly set life with a perfectly organized mother. They need to see you happy, and they’ll learn what happiness is.

Kids don’t need a perfect surrounding to thrive. They need love and attention. And a happy mom. So don’t beat yourself up for being a mess. Just embrace it. 

Spring looks for less

spring looks for less

Spring is finally here! And for us living in Canada it finally means we can switch those winter boots for a cute pair of peep toes and big furry coats for light bomber jackets!

Though to be honest, fashion was something I disliked since having babies: I didn’t fit in the “perfect body” standards, suddenly I got a muffin top and I had to buy nursing-friendly tops only ( at least I’m over with that part for now!). And I had so many other expenses! So I lost the pleasure in dressing all together.

But since I try to be more mindful in my everyday, I realized I can still find outfits that’ll make me feel good. And that dressing our bodies is also an important part of self-care! So if you too feel stuck, I say start with the little things that’ll make you smile, look for colors that make your soul sing, and accessories that make you want to go out!

So I have partnered with Giant Tiger to bring you two spring looks: for less. Two looks in which I feel ready for spring and happy, and I’m sure you would too!


Le printemps est finalement arrivé! Cela veut dire qu’on peut finalement échanger nos grossses bottes d’hiver pour de mignonnes chaussures de printemps, et remplacer les manteaux chauds par de légers « bomber jackets » à la mode.

Mais il faut que j’avoue, lorsque je suis devenue une maman, j’ai arrêté d’aimer la mode. Mon corps a changé, le ventre a poussé, il a fallu que je porte des hauts pour allaiter ( au moins ça s’est fini!). En plus, avec des enfants il y a tellement d’autres dépenses!

Mais récemment, j’essaie de prendre plus soin de moi et j’ai réalisé que s’habiller joliment a un impact important sur comment je me sens. Et que s’est une partie importante du bien-être général. Alors, si toi aussi tu te sens coincée, commence par de petits détails qui vont te faire sourire, cherche les couleurs qui te rendent heureuse et les accessoires qui donnent le gout de sortir plus! 

Alors, en collaboration avec Tigre Géant, j’ai préparé deux looks printaniers pas chers.  Des agencements dans lesquels je me sens bien et prête pour le printemps!  Et vous le serez aussi!

spring looks for less

spring looks for less

spring looks for less

I just love the details on that blouse! And this long skirt the powder pink shade of the season is the most comfortable and soft piece I have tried in a while! And you just can’t go wrong with florals , pink and a bit of bohemian flair for spring! Also, bomber jackets are the bomb of the spring!(Pun intended!) And Giant Tiger has so many to chose from!


J’aime tellement les détails sur cette chemise! Et cette jupe de couleur rose de saison est la plus confortable et douce que j’ai porté depuis longtemps! En plus, on ne se trompe jamais en combinant motifs fleuris, un peu de rose et une touche bohème. Et le « bomber jacket », c’est la bombe du printemps ( hihi) et Tigre Géant a une belle sélection!

spring looks for less

spring fashion on a budget

Whole outfit: Lili Morgan Brand ( found only at Giant Tiger)

And I love how spring fashion this year is full of bohemian prints and accessories! Be it that white shirt, or these earnings, I’m so happy I could have find so many lovely bohemian options!


Et je dois dire que cette année, j’adore tout simplement comment la mode du printemps est pleine d’inspirations bohème. Quelle chance d’avoir tout ça pour un si petit prix.

spring fashion on a budget

spring looks for less

spring looks for less

And as for this tunic, it’s my new go-to choice! Thanks to that belt, it gives you the illusion of waist, while being most comfortable piece of summer clothing! I’m pretty sure I’ll be wearing it throughout the summer with sleeves rolled up too! And my new favorite: this blue cross body bag! I just love the punch of color ton the strap! And it goes with literally everything!


Parlons maintenant de cette robe tunique! C’est mon passe-partout en ce moment et je suis certaine que je vais la reporter pendant l’été aussi ( en roulant les manches!). Elle est très confortable et parfaite pour toutes les silhouettes! Et aussi: cette bourse, qui je vous jure, marche avec tout tout tout!

spring looks for less

spring looks for less

spring fashion on a budget

Whole outfit: Lily Morgan Brand ( found only at Giant Tiger)

Honestly, I know too well the struggle of dressing that mama-body, and of staying within a budget! But I also know now, that our bodies are the vessels of our souls, and that dressing yourselves in comfortable, and pretty clothes is such an important part of self-care. And when it can be done on a budget, then I call it a win-win!


Tout le look: Collection Lily Morgan, exclusive à Tigre Géant.

Honnêtement, je connais très bien la difficulté de s’habiller après avoir eu des enfants, et à l’intérieur du budget familial. Mais si notre corps est le vaisseau de notre âme, alors s’habiller joliment c’est prendre soin de soi. Et si on peut le faire avec un petit budget, je pense que c’est une vrai victoire. 

Ce post est fait en collaboration avec Tigre Géant. Toutes les opinions sont exclusivement les miennes. 

Disclosure: This post was brought to you by Giant Tiger, all opinions remain my own.

 

10 tips to raise self-driven girls

10 tips to raise self driven girls, girls who'll know what they want and how to get it.. while staying kind and open minded. Parenting tips and ideas for every girl mom (or dad)

Recently I’ve met this self-driven, beautiful and successful women, a real girl boss, and while talking to her, she said lowering her voice that she is a feminist. And then she looked around to see if anyone listened. I just smiled and said that she doesn’t need to worry about words around me, because I consider myself as a feminist, and I hope to raise my girls to be feminists too. And I realized, that even if a boss lady from a big city is afraid to use this world, then there’s still so much work to be done.

What does it mean to be or not a feminist, is still a huge discussion. Lots of educated self-driven woman will say they’re not, they’re just strong and believe in right for education and equal pay. Many stay at home mom’s that I know will openly say that they are feminists. Many feminists will say that a woman who doesn’t work isn’t really a feminist, and many SAHM’s will see feminists as arrogant and self centered people.

Recently Emma Watson, a young, self-driven actress and a voice of modern feminism, was criticized for doing a photo shoot that showed her breasts a bit more then she usually does. And she was accused of not being a feminist.. by feminists.. And it just showed how much misconceptions there are out there.

But in the end, aren’t all self-driven women who believe in freedom of choice feminists? Be it engineer, a stay-at-home-mom, or both . If all of them believe girls should have access to education and health services, then I think they are all feminist. So why be scared of this word?

People have these ideas about what a women should be, how should she act and look. And as a mom of two girls, who’ll become woman all too soon, I want them to know that in these discussions, what’s really important is the attitude, that freedom that you give yourself and others. Not an etiquette.

I hope to raise girls who won’t have these misconceptions about other women. About how a woman should look, act and talk in order to be seen as a good / intelligent / feminine / good mother / well raised / feminist enough / liberated / modest enough etc. Who won’t really care about all these etiquette’s and labels. Who won’t listen to others saying what they can and can’t do, but who’ll listen to their own inner voice. I hope to be raising self-driven girls.

I hope they’ll only follow a social code for being kind and open minded people. That they’ll decide for themselves how they should live their life. That they won’t be afraid of a word feminism. Nor strength nor motherhood nor femininity. I hope they’ll grow in to women who won’t judge other woman for being too much: too loud, too opinionated, too timid, too modest, too sexy, too carrier driven, too mommy-like. That they won’t say other woman are not enough: not enough of a feminist, not enough of a mother, not enough of a lady, not enough of a professional. Women who won’t put a tag on other women. Nor on themselves.

raising self-driven girls

So how do I make sure that my daughters will grow in to self driven, non-judgmental kind and open women? Well, of course time will only show if I succeeded, but for now, here’s what I do:

  1. I want them to choose for themselves. Be it putting their food on their plate, choosing their clothes, or crafts ideas, as long as it makes sense and isn’t in conflict with their safety or health, I want them to learn to take their own decisions. Girls who make their own decisions from young age are less likely to believe that that they need to fit in the stereotype in order to have friends or be beach ready. They are also more likely to choose a carer path ( or a motherhood route) in tune with their true feelings and dreams.
  2. I encourage them to (politely) argument why they want or don’t wan’t something. I think that often we tend to teach girls to be polite first and to say what they wan’t second, while we teach boys to stand for themselves first and be polite second. Well I think that kids need both, and that girls need more then ever to stand for themselves and say what they want. Because if ever they choose to be a working professional, nobody will give them a raise just because they waited politely for it to happen.
  3. I try to teach them the difference between an opinion and a judgment. Which means it’s fine to say at home what they like and dislike, but it’s not fine to say that other’s likes and dislikes are stupid or silly. ( Let’s say that this one is a starting point to many sisterly disputes around the table, and that we’are still working on it!).
  4. I try to talk to them about people around us, and their life choices in a way that they can see the ocean of possibilities rather then good and bad paths to follow. I have friends who are working full time and raising kids, I have friends who are full time stay at home moms, I have friends who don’t have kids, and who travel and live alone. Some are vegetarian and some dress in a different way. Some have tattoos and some are a part of a bible study. When we talk about other people I try to always let them know that all choices are good, as long as they come from the heart.
  5. I try to explain to them how everyone has their own perspective, and how we should always think abut how things look from a different point of view. Books and movies are always a great starting point. Imaginative play is another. I’d ask them how would you feel now if you where ( insert : your sister, or cat, your grandma, me, etc..) this exercise may be too difficult for a toddler, but my five year old got pretty good in it.
  6. Get dad involved. Girls who see men tackling house duties are more likely to believe that anyone can do anything.
  7. I let my girls help around, both in the kitchen as with tools ( as much as they can in their age). I hope they’ll be able to see which type of work they prefer ( and if both, then good for them!)
  8. I talk to them about publicity in the media and social stereotypes ( still very present in mainstream TV), even if they are really young. I’d say: look, this is someone who’s trying to sell us something ( and then we’d guess what is it). This isn’t real life. This may not be as good of a product as they say. I want them to be very judgmental when it comes to publicity, as this is where a lot of social messages are hidden, especially regarding how women should look and dress.
  9.  Whatever you do, tell your story to your kids, let them know why you choose to stay at home with them or work, or do both. Read them stories of other women and their different life choices. ( Great book that I’m recently in love in, is: “Bedtime stories for rebel girls” , not that rebellious after all, but very touching with 100 stories of women throughout the history, following their path and their dreams often against all the odds).
  10. And above all, I try to acknowledge their emotions, because I believe that only by letting them express their feelings, and experience kindness and compaction, they’ll learn how to be kind and compassionate themselves. (Within healthy boundaries and limits off-course!).

So for me raising self-driven girls, means raising girls who are kind and strong, sure of what they want and not afraid of social tags. Girls who don’t look at people from above, and who don’t care about stereotypes. Girls who follow their dreams. And who encourage others. Who are feminists. Now, wish me luck in making that happen!

 

 

Easter surprise craft & printable

Easter surprise craft

There’s so many reasons to be exited for spring and Easter! There’s the gorgeous spring weather that finally let’s us explore nature and the outdoors, the traditional egg painting and the egg hunting with kids. Then there are Easter family gatherings and last but not the least, new Amazon’s award winning children’s series springtime special, the Tumble Leaf ” Spring-a-ling Surprise”!
And while I’m quite strict when it comes to screen time and kids, I’m always so happy when I can find new educational and well made kids shows!

So to celebrate spring and Easter, we got inspired by this sweet whimsical and beautiful episode, and decided to make our own version of the Tumble Leaf Easter eggs. And my girls could not have been happier!

So if you your kids still don’t know the Tumble Leaf series, then let me assure you, that they’ll love it! This series is beautifully made, with gorgeous aesthetics and captures my kids attention every single time! But what I love the most about it, is how it inspires my girls to craft and play after they finish watching it! And when I look at them, concentrated and with their eyes wide opened, it melts my mama’s heart!

Easter surprise series and craft

Easter craft

So after watching this new spring episode, we decided we’ll make our very own spring surprise eggs! And you can craft along with us, since I have prepared a printable for you, that you can cut out and color with your kids! Just download and print the 3 page sheets and you’re ready to go!

Easter surprise craft

Easter surprise craft

Easter surprise craft

Printable Easter preschool activity


All you need to do:

  1. Print out the coloring sheets I made for you.You can get the full three pages printable coloring sheets here
  2.  Let your kids color them, and then help them cut the eggs, pots, butterflies and bunnies out!
  3. Prepare glue, and let them put together their own Easter Surprise eggs!
  4. Don’t forget to watch the episode, and find out what are the names of your eggs and what signs of spring has Fig the Fox uncovered !

As for my girls, we might make many more Easter surprise eggs, because as Rose pointed out, we need to have as many as Bloom the bunny in the Tumble Leaf!

And how many will you make?

Easter surprise craft

Disclosure: This is a sponsored post, all opinion remain my own.

Free prints for coffee lovers

free prints for coffee lovers

I’m a coffee lover aka an obsessed and addicted mombie ( commonly known as a tired mom-zombie), and I’m not ashamed to admit it! Actually I love my coffee so much, that I have made these two prints for my home, that you can download and print at home for yourself too!

Because let’s be honest here, parenting wouldn’t really happen without a big dose of caffeine in the morning! These sleepless nights and early wake ups are only bearable because of coffee ( I admit it could be tea too). So to celebrate that little magical bean, today I give you not one, but two free coffee lovers prints!

First is the simple reminder of life priorities as a mom :

” But First Coffee”

And the second sums up the dynamic in my home pretty well:

“This home runs on strong coffee & lot’s of sweet cuddles!”

And since I’m still pretty much obsessed with calligraphy style prints, both of them are just that, black and white quotes, that blend in with any decor! So just pick your favorite, download and print!

free prints for coffee lovers

free prints for coffee lovers

free prints for coffee lovers

free prints for coffee lovers

So you can get the ” But First Coffee” here, and the “This home runs on strong coffee & lot’s of sweet cuddles!” here.

And a little reminder: when printing at home, try using thicker and better quality paper, that way your prints will look like from a print shop!

Now, let’s have some more coffee, shall we?

free prints for coffee lovers

Family-bonding board game

Let me start from the beginning, and explain why this board game is actually a bonding family game and why it’s so special for me and my family.

So two weeks ago, I’ve learned that an average Canadian family spends a total of 14% of their time at home together! Now if you think about it, it’s really not a lot! So Leon’s have conducted a social experiment, and have helped one family track their family time, with Project Smart Furniture! They have got a sofa, that was tracking all family members time spent together! My girls were very intrigued with it, and honestly it got me thinking a lot too.

printable family board game

So first, I really encourage you to watch this video! It’s fascinating how it all worked out! And secondly, I think I have found a solution! I was really trying to think about a way to get a families together more, and it hit me: by playing more together!

Of course, any type of game that makes you spend time together as a family is good, but imagine a game that lets the family bond? That gives everyone an opportunity to talk about how they feel and how they see other family members. And what they love about each and every one. A game that leaves everyone with that felling-good emotion, when you look around and think, yes, this is my place, and these are my people. A game that let’s kid see how parents see them, and parents see how their kids describe them. A game that makes everyone listen when others speak.

So as you know, I studied psychology, and one of my favorite things was group therapy sessions. So this game is based on that principle of a group bonding session.

But what kids will see, is a dice and roll board game, where the winner get’s a doughnut! A game with cute tokens and a Popsicle for the person loosing his tour.

family bonding board game

So here’s what you need:

  • Download and print “Donut you want to win” game. I suggest using thick paper, so the game can last longer!
  • Use duck tape to glue the pages of the board game together. ( If you’d like to make it prettier and thicker, print the last page 2 more times, and glue them at the back of the board game page)
  • Cut out the question cards ( again, if you want them thinker, print the last page 4 more times, and glue it in together with the question page, wait until it dries, and then cut out the questions)
  • Pick out the tokens you like, and cut them out
  • Cut out the doughnut and the Popsicle , and glue them together.
  • Let your kids help you with all the steps!

Free printable board game , a family bonding game!

Family bonding board game

family bonding board game

Family bonding board game

family bonding board game

Now, It’s time to play! Grab the page with rules, and read them aloud. Let everyone choose their token. Prepare a dice. Place the cards on the board, and the doughnut and the Popsicle on their spots. Have fun!

family bonding board game

family bonding board game

family bonding board game

family bonding board game

family bonding board game

family bonding board game

You can add your own questions if you wish! And of-course, helping each other is encouraged!

Seeing my family bonding together, my kids laughing at my hubby’s imitations, and my daughters making up songs about us, makes my heart so happy and full. I hope you’ll feel the same after playing with your family! And it’s funny how it all started with Project Smart Furniture!

 

disclosure: This post was brought to you by Leon’s, all opinions remain my own.

 

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